“All opinions are that of the author and not necessarily those of the website that it is published under.”
Being raised in an era when girls are not taught to be feminine in their behavior. I sometimes rethink should I be feminine in my behavior or not? Looking through the premises of this indubitable dilemma, one gets encountered with questions whether it is a “crafted inferiority complex” within Daughter of Eve or is there any ideological invisible force which threatens her to be herself? Living within the paradoxically complex nostrums and patriarchal social setup, which describes her some under developed “subject”, “less-human”, and “non-entity”, in comparison to the “superior human”. She is then bombarded with the questions rather blames like why there is radical shift within her behavior? Why women become hardened? Essentially why is she less feminine?
Let’s face the intricacies of this reality historically, the problems involved with the issues faced by women are multiple and can be seen from various perspectives. Like many Philosophers have defined the position of women below dignity and not deserving to be considered equal to man. As Democritus, “Thought ill of women…” Hesiod declared, “women merely a chattel”. Nietzsche in Beyond Good and Evil crossed all the standards of decency by saying that, “women has so much cause for shame, in women there is pedantry, superficiality, petty presumptions, and indiscretion concealed…we should think of women as property, as Orientals do.” Rousseau believes that, “The Women were supposed to have been created to “Feel rather than reason”. However, there were exceptional voices among some philosophers too. Like Pythagoras maintains: “Women as a sex are more naturally akin to piety”. John Stuart Mill’s espousal of gender equality in the nineteenth century, The Subjugation of Women, published in 1869 was a plea for equal status for women in the areas of education, employment and political rights to vote.
Over the ages, women has first been demonized as a lesser being and then in the post-renaissance liberated under the influence of industrial capitalism. It was with the advent of Islam, with the Prophethood of Muhammad (saas) that women were enlightened. Women are accorded more equal rights and raised into an esteemed position in Islam. Now the question arises why we see such a radical shift within the new generation of Muslim women whose history was brimming with a confident manifestation of Islamic identity. Asma Barla in “Believing Women in Islam” says, It is obvious that much is at stake for Muslims in how we answer these questions, especially in view of the increasing levels of violence against women in many states from Afghanistan to Algeria today given a widespread tendency to blame Islam for oppressing Muslims (esp. women) rather than Muslims for misreading Islam. Amina Wudud in Women and Islam says, I used to think that “Islam” and “Muslims” shared the same unified goal of serving (Islam)…I have seen that situations may arise where one might be forced to choose between the two. Islam has provided all rights to women but Muslims have snatched almost all . Actually, Women followed Islam wholeheartedly but were fed up by rigidity, dominance, duality, and patriarchy of upholders of religion.
Simone de Beauvoir in her famous work “The Second Sex”, remarks, “Woman has always been man’s dependent, if not his slave; the tow sexes have never shared the world in equality”. And then see Simon de Beauvoir’s provocative declaration, “He is the subject, and he is the Absolute__ she is the other.” To be the other is to be the non-subject, the non-person, the non-agent__in short the mere body. Man looked at her with disdain. These perspectives had deleteriously affected the psychology and behavior of women. Historically men in general haven’t valued the femininity beyond how it has granted their own needs. They want women have to offer; sex, being taken care of progeny, and having someone to do the menial. Yet the world, as men have made it, values masculine traits while feminine traits and values are to be used denigrated.
To take the journey of an average woman is to go from being someone’s wife and someone’s mother, and grandmother and so on. As she enters the new family, she changes her being as well, from a receiver, to a giver of life__but men haven’t valued her rather his exceedingly nebulous, abrasive and abhorrent behavior and dastardly violence leaves deep unbearable wounds in their heart, mind and soul. Alas! This ultra-superior being has rudimentary knowledge about women and her sufferings thus can’t understand the nature of that pain. This superior species consider themselves as some unquestionable and archetypal representatives of less-human (women).
While being in intra-psychic world clearly exasperated, she whispers…How can I be the mother of those who scattered childhood of 5 year old angle, how can I be sister of those who crushed innocent teen queen, how can I be daughter of those who mysteriously murdered young girl, how can I be wife of those who harass school teacher, who assault a college girl by sprinkling acid on her. How can I …, how can I…from whom nobody feels safe …nobody…not even their sisters and daughters?
It’s no small wonder that women were so easily duped into Feminism. She allies herself with feminism considering felicitously same as her solace. Feminism was not opposition but reaction. Fed up with being feminine, she assumed it’s actually her femininity, which is real cause of her sufferings.
Susain Brown, a feminist, wrote in feminist, 1984“Femininity is a nostalgic tradition of imposed limitations on women. Biological femaleness is not enough, one works at femininity by accepting restrictions limiting ones rights, by choosing an indirect route, by scattering concentration and not giving ones all as a man would to his own artifiably masculine interests. Femininity is a grand collection of compromises, large and small.” It’s not astonishing that women of this generation did not cultivate femininity, but suppressed it. Betty Friedan in her phenomenal book “The Feminine Mystique”, made it permissible for women to say things like “we are not happy being just a wife, housekeeper or mother. These roles are not fulfilling our fullest potential. We want more! According to Yasmin Mogahed, objectification of women in today’s hyper sexual societies has been criticized by western feminists. In trying to break out of this, what has happened is that women feminism came into it and tried to liberate women from the bondage of being a sexual object. But the problem with this so called liberation is that God has been taken out of the equation. This has resulted in degrading her from the essence of her existence—an equal partner in the paired creation of the Creator.
In nearly every culture on earth femininity and masculinity are opposite. No straight man wants to be perceived as effeminate, and no straight women can bear the thought of coming across as manly. But unfortunately, while being in smog, women began to think that they should mimic men or they should be more like a man. Therefore, they will be more honored and dignified. The current economic model and prevailing social programming of the time push women towards masculinity by framing it as “liberation”. Feminism sells women the lie that to masculine is to become free. She has accepted a faulty assumption. She has accepted that man is the standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human being until she becomes just like a man. It convinces the feminine to divorce herself from her nature and to aspire that which she isn’t and should became more manlike, fierce, assertive, a conqueror! Oh! Man you played linchpin roles in the dying art of femininity.
As such, the women assuming Feminism as her solace aims to emulate the qualities of men rather than master the art of femininity and for that matter is femininity an art? These women have been contorted in a belief to reject traditional femininity as abhorrent and weak. They delusively emulate the behavior of men, whilst harboring a hatred for men. They idolize such behavior because they have been taught it is necessary to acquire success and respect. They could not be any more wrong. Nothing raises the ire and disdain of man more than of women who attempts to make him absolute by emulating him. Just how can the feminine continue to exist within the modern world when it is psychologically beaten out of women on a day-to-day basis? How can women be kind, caring and sensitive when they must work in the world of business, a masculine albeit, sociopathic world of margining cultivation of femininity.
For women, the problem with this approach is that, she is not getting what she want, even to her harm her internal and external being. Here starts her internal tussle. While being with herself coming out of her dilemmas and delusion, while introspecting her selfhood, she whispers, something is wrong, something is missing actually I am Missing.
Daughter of Eve woke up to the sun of post-theological secular liberal crafted discourse and Feminism was tool used to force them to throw away the fetters of religion and religious obligations. Today women aren’t just complementary to men; they’re also frequently in direct competition. However, being feminine doesn’t mean being weak and dependent. It means embracing your identity as women.
Feminism is the prison, not femininity. Why don’t son of Adam and for that matter those patrons of feminists understand they can only be secure in masculinity when women is secure in her femininity. For women to preserve their greatest asset of femininity, they must avoid masculinization at all costs. This is healthier and more conducive to a women’s development than adapting masculine boisterousness. Continuing feminism means jeopardizing the future of femininity. It truly is tragic that feminism too betrayed women and dismantled her being. Ah! Where shall the Daughter of Eve find her solace? Oh! Son of Adam, I have something to share with you, Veiled Truth, I am fully human.
Appeal from Daughter of Eve: Oh! Son of Adam, let Divine message remain Divine, don’t mingle your patriarchal mind-set in it. Don’t you think it’s high time to end our detrimental chasm? God dignifies both men and women in their distinctiveness not their sameness. Let us not import the idea of those who transformed the human race from “representatives of God on earth” to mere “mute taciturn subjects”. Let her actualize egalitarian voice of Islam and God-given liberation. Please don’t become barrier between her and her lord. Let my verses be revealed on me where Almighty showers His blessings upon me, shows His concern by interrupting when daughter of Eve and the mother of believers-Aisha (r.a) was blamed, raised her status not because Allah considered her weak but He cares for her, you and me. God has honored me by giving me value in relation to Him. It’s only my communion with Almighty, which induces relation, satisfaction and safety within me.
May be it is too little late for the ideologues of Feminism and ignorant men to be reminded of what they have done to make women flee their feminine role. Still the idea that man themselves or in large part responsible for women turning their backs on true femininity, their feminine roles and its importance needs to be included in discussions from time to time.
NOTE: What we need is to get out of this illusion and help women to come out from the chains of fatigue, sponsored and supported by super-powers of world exploiting her under the most exploited slogan of so called “Empowerment”. The best empowerment comes from freeing yourself from the fetters of inflicted ideas and ideologies in different garbs and identifying the necessary reason for the essence of your existence.
“All opinions are that of the author and not necessarily those of the website that it is published under.”
